Dios mio, man. He pedals up the hill 'til it goes "click"
Load up on energy drinks because he's hyper to beat you.
He'll turn your plan of keeping up with him into a triage statistic.
Solid & dangerous like an old ice bag at the bottom of a freezer.
Even Tepito calls him "Sir" when he passes on the flats.
Get out of his way or you'll feel your shadow is faster than you.
This man won't wait for anybody or anything. Give him a podium now!
Plays it smooth & flowy like Kenny G but with much better hair.
After your spank, she'll baby wipe the dirt she kicked on your face.
When he says "On your left" is not a polite notice, it's an order!
No rules, no restrictions. Just ruthless & vicious podiums.
Ok boomer, get out his way. This kid mows you down for a living.
Know that gut feel when you get dropped? Now you know her name.
The OG Zombie Camels. Master of local trails, fire, Jeeps & brews.
Stealth & quiet until you hear the "on your left" command.
Not even drones can keep up. All he lives for is podium photos.
A race strategist that'll PowerPoint the reason he left you in the dust.
Everybody is not having fun tonight unless he allows it. He won't.
Bearded Race Pit master managing tent like a fine FEMA trailer.
Race Pit invisible spirit that hovers around the drink cooler.